Apology and Disclaimer
Before I get trampled by a herd of revolting teachers, let me assure everyone that I hold the teaching profession in the highest regard.
I also know that, as in any profession, there are a few teachers who just aren't up to the job. Incompetent doctors bury their mistakes, incompetent chefs poison their customers and incompetent teachers bore their pupils to death (and then wonder why the kids fail all their exams).
The hopeless teachers featured in these poems are works of fiction and the product of my febrile imagination. Any resemblance to real teachers, either living, dead or indeterminate, is entirely coincidental.
If you happen to be called Miss Tibbs or Miss Pelling, the poems will be all the funnier for your pupils and my apologies all the more sincere.